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An Intro, By Rachel

An Intro, by Courtney

Almost 4 year old potty accidents
tenma drawing
My daughter turns four next month and had been potty trained since just before 2 years. She regressed a bit when her sister was born this last February but had gotten better. Now in the last three months she's started having accidents because she's waiting to long or just doesn't want to bother with going to the bathroom. Today we were all playing in her room and I notice her bouncing oddly on her bed I asked her if she needed to use the potty. She was adamant that she didn't need to.
Five minutes later she gets up and there's a huge wet spot on the bed. I asked her why she went potty in her pants and she said because she didn't want to stop playing. When she does this I give consequences. I make her go sit on the potty to make sure everything is out, change her and since she had the accident because she didn't want to stop playing we were done playing that particular game. She melted down over this and I ended up giving her an early bedtime.

I'm going nuts. She was awesome about using the potty for a year and a half and now we need to make her sit on the toilet every four hours if she doesn't go herself and it's turning into a battle. I'm at the point where I'm starting to react in anger and I don't want that so I need to take a huge step back and reassess how I'm handling this. I'd love advice from any parents who've been through this. What worked for you?

Best Cloth Diaper Reviews
Laura McMillan

Me Portrait me by subvocaled@pearlseas
Looking for some advice here... What else would you go here for, eh? :-) Well, apart from talking about how lovely your kid is of course.

And I do have a lovely daughter. Most of the time... But lately she's gotten into a habit, and it is really really draining and I am not 100% sure what to do about it.

She is 8 months old right now, and she's always been good at bedtime... except now, apparently...

Because she falls asleep nicely somewhere between 7 and 8pm. We put her to bed and then... she wakes up again 20-40mins later.

And refuses to fall asleep again. We won't get her to fall alseep untli around 10pm, sometimes later. And always always in my lap... Daddy is no good, just me, apparently. Which is exhausting since she is with me all day long and my hubby does try to take some load off my shoulders during the evenings after his after-work-nap.

So now what to do? Sitting for hours with a fussy baby that won't be still every evening is not very fun, let me tell you... Or is it a phase? Any ideas thoughts would be very very welcome...


(no subject)
Leverage parker by mikeyrhcp
Over Thanksgiving, Grandma & Grandpa gave us gifts to give N for his birthday (12/8) and Christmas. We were given the instructions to parcel them out for whichever one as we saw fit. (They were unwrapped and under tissue in a gift bag.) There was A LOT of stuff - most of which I think N will love, even if I don't. (OMG, more Thomas? A blanket and backpack and many more trains and books? ARGH!)

There was also a LeapFrog Learn to Read device and several books to go with it. Maybe I'm old fashioned, but I think its up to the parents to teach a kid to read, not an impersonal electronic device.** Also, since N is such a little memorizer (he points out when we skip one measly little unimportant word in a bedtime story that he's only had read to him once before!) I'm not sure it would even be all that useful? Is it unethical to return that portion of the gift without N ever knowing it was there? Should we tell the grandparents?

** And if anyone has any thoughts about the Leapfrog itself and why it might be better to keep, please do let me know. There may be (probably are!) things I have not considered.

A matter of life and death
comfort by G
I have got a hard one for all you fellow parents... please forgive me.

Read more...Collapse )

Toddler management ideas
corset binding

So... it's finally come time. My just turned 18mth old son has decided that shoving other kids (and babies) over is fun. Or easier than walking around them. I'm sure it's just a little 'phase' but it's pretty horrible.

Ideas people?

We don't do time out (yet) because he just doesn't understand it (he thinks we're being mean and immediately gets uncontrollably sad), and I normally just do distraction/redirection with him.  In the last week though we've suddenly got tantrums (that he stomps off and gets over himself usually) that last about a minute, we've had shoving and hitting and face pinching.  "we are not amused"

I've started counting 1,2,3 and then removing him to sit on an adult chair (which he then takes a while to work out how to get down). This seems an effective 'time out/down time' for now, but given he's the size of a three year old it's not going to take him long to master that skill.  I let him wail and gnash his teeth if he's going to - he's got to learn how to deal with disappointment and frustration, and chucking a wobbly isn't going to change my mind.

For some months any time he hit/took glasses etc we would just get up and walk away - this worked (and still does) - but that was aggression directed at us, not at other little people.

I'll say up front - we don't want to do heavy handed discipline with him at this point - he's normally a really relaxed and chilled little boy, with a lot of heart (and he's very sensitive if he thinks you're actually hurt etc) - so forced time outs (where I would have to stand over him and force him to sit facing a corner or whatever), any kind of spanking, restraining, things that might be perceived as 'aggressive' etc are out. 

I'm also incredibly mindful that he's HUGE compared to his peers and he will almost be bigger than every other person he encounters (his dad is 2m tall, and he's following in his foot steps) so we need to teach him to be gentle, that pushing/shoving isn't ok.  I don't want to do anything 'aggressive' or 'forceful' in managing his behaviour because I fear this will show him that these tactics are ok to use - when they really aren't for him.  I am prepared to be firm, set a solid line, and not budge though.

(no subject)
Chuck Feelings by PresidentTrix
Sometimes I feel like I'm creating problems where there are none. (I mean, I have to come up with SOMETHING now that the kid is nearly all done with potty training, right? ;)) But here goes. Thoughts and/or advice welcome.

N is 2.75 years. There is another boy, P, who is 4. They go to the same daycare/preschool and are in different rooms, but outside time is usually all combined ages, so they spend plenty of time together. And have gotten in trouble for biffing and bashing quite a bit. (Anyone else's kids obsessed with Thomas the Tank Engine? Biffing and Bashing are crashing things -- sometimes people! -- into each other like engines and freight cars.) We've gone over a gazillion times with the N that biffing and bashing are not nice and not acceptable behavior. He mostly gets it when at home. I never see him do it at the playground with other children. But when he's with P... Ugh.

The complication is not so much at preschool, but at church and church school where they are together and cause all kinds of havoc. (It's a small group of maybe two dozen people total with kids ranging in age from 2-8. ) My initial thought was that it was P initiating things. I've seen N with other groups of kids and he's perfectly fine, in fact he's kind of reticent and keeps to himself a bit. But with P, he goes all kinds of haywire. On closer observation, I really think it's the combination of the two of them more than any one starting things.

Leaving church school is not an option. Getting P's mom involved is difficult because she's also the pastor and generally has her hands full already. (Yes, it's occurred to me that this might be contributing to the problem.) No amount of time out, quiet time away from P, or talking about good vs bad behavior has helped. The second N is back near P, he's back to being insane.

Any thoughts on how to proceed? I get inordinately stressed whenever we have church school and never enjoy a second of it because I spend the whole time trying to keep N & P somewhat under control. Thanks! (And sorry for the length. I am not known for conciseness. ;))

Choosing, Routinesand Sleep
I found something that may help with bedtime. First off, we have a convertable crib that comes with a cubby on the side, and the railing comes off to make a toddler bed and eventually a regular bed.

Sorry its long, but I hope it helps with rough bedtimeCollapse )

(no subject)


Kids and Photographers
Over the edge
This upcoming Friday, I'm having a photographer coming over to take pictures. We've chosen to do an outdoor shoot since it's pretty gorgeous where I live, and the shoot will mostly focus on the kids. I have two girls, 2.5 years old and almost 4 month old.

We haven't done professional pictures since our kids were born so I'm very excited AND anxious. Especially about my 2 year old since she's at that age where tantrums happen and she's getting harder to photograph (for me anyway.) The baby is just happy as can be, so I'm not too worried. I know I'm doing this to myself, but I was hoping that some of you might have some words of advice. The photographer specializes in children pictures and she's worked in a daycare so I know she's probably used to anything, but I would still like to do whatever I can on my side to make things go as smooth as possible. If you've been there, as a mom or photographer and have any words of wisdom, feel free to share.